The holiday myth we’re busting today is a little different-the idea that your home must be absolutely perfect if you’re hosting family for Christmas. If you buy into all of the magazine advertisements and catalog images of picture-perfect homes, you can end up spending a lot of money and causing yourself a lot of stress. And at Christmas time, the last thing you need is more stress.

According to the folks at Organized Christmas, a site devoted to helping you plan your holiday season and relieve stress, these homes are “coldly perfect” and not very welcoming-and it’s the welcoming that really matters. Your house should feel warm and inviting, not make guests feel scared to touch anything. The spirit is what really counts.

The spirit is something you provide yourself. You can’t buy it, decorate it, make it, clean it, sew it, or cook it. You want your guests to cherish memories of the time they spent in your home, whether it’s just this year or for years to come.

This year, don’t focus on having everything in its place and looking picture-perfect-instead, surround your guests with warmth, light, cheer, and good smells. Focus on the spirit of the season, and not on making your home into something it isn’t.